“I WILL DO ANYTHING, BUT THAT!“ THE SEXY-BEAST SUPERMAN, PART 2
Chris Buse (RIP)
At the heart of the maze there was a monster. There always is. And there is always a girl. A virgin, to be sacrificed to the minotaur or some other mystical creature, half man, half beast. And there is the hero who has one job. To slay the behemoth, the colossus, who has his only eye trained on him, the leviathan from the depth of the Earth. Sure, saving the girl came with the job description as well. However, there was something off this time. For starters, there was not just one hairy creature he was up against. And, maybe more importantly, the girl was no longer a virgin. She and the hero had already consummated their relationship. This came after the girl had seen right through the disguise he donned to walk among mere mortals, to learn of their local customs without any unduly disturbance or hassle. They had made love to each other before the hero had faced the monster, or monsters in this case. Most significantly, however, in this version of the story, the girl was dead. The hero had failed, this time. Sure, some solace could be gleaned from how he had proven himself worthy, when another girl, the one who had wanted to kiss him under an apple tree, had been swept up in the big paws of a beast of a similar kind. But she was the girl next door the hero had known most of his young life. This was a different girl. She was the dream girl of the hero. And unbeknownst to the lad who now was heartbroken and full of rage, she had been selected and designed to be just that. The girl of his dreams. Saving any other girl from a 100-foot gorilla meant little to him now. Of course, this wasn“t a tale about characters of ancient mythology, but about those from a comic book. And everybody knows that these are not real. Stories such as this one neither come from mankind“s history, nor are they based on the conceptualization of historical facts as a shared experience. They aren“t even folktales. But then again, to quote Thomas Hobbs in “Leviathan”“: “Imagination and memory are but one thing, which for diverse considerations hath diverse names.”“ It was a story as told in a comic book, but this was also a tale as old and as real as our collective memory. A tale as powerful as any folklore passed on from one generation to the next in a hushed whisper in the presence of a flickering fire casting shadows on the walls of the sheltering cave. Thou shalt not kill. That was the one tenet that stood in opposition to the hero“s calling. He was to slay the monster in the maze. But what if, by doing so, the hero failed? Again. And this was no ordinary hero, mind you. Like Atlas, he could lift a world off its axis, but more so, he could crush a whole star system in a day“s work. With such a powerful being, was it not prudent to teach him how to adjust his moral compass in such a way that any direction did not come up north, but compassion and forgiveness? A teaching passed on from father to son. His eyes stinging with pain, his heart bleeding, angry and confused, still he raised his fists. Would we want to stop him, after some hastily applied due process for the perpetrators“ sake, very quickly we would discover that none of us had the ability to do so, that in fact we were as weak and accident-prone as he only pretended to be when like Henry the King, he donned a coat to conceal his true self, listening to our concerns and pleas. He was not doing this to ready us for battle, but to show us the way. He was leading by example. Such a leader was allowed to have doubts, to feel pain, anger even, but he needed to be of inner strength and compassion. And was there a better way really, to prove your mettle as both a hero and a leader, than by showing others that you were willing, and able, to spare your enemy from lethal harm? Not because it was easy, especially not with your love at your feet, still as if resting, but all life and joy and shared moments of happiness having left her, but because it was hard. Not because of strength so powerful no other being could hope or dare to compare, but for restrained, solicitude even, a man will become more than a man, and a boy will become a hero who is so even of temperament and well-balanced, that such noble and genuine fortitude will belie his young age, but never his character.
She just appeared. Just like that. But lest we judge the requirements of storytelling too harshly as is our wont in this day and age, is this not how things often go in our so-called “real world”“? People enter into our sphere. They“ll either darken or hopefully brighten up our microcosm for a span of time. Then we“ll lose touch with them as sudden as we first met them. Years later, when hurrying from one place to the next, maybe at an airport, we will spot a vaguely familiar face, re-shaped by the passing of time perhaps, so much so, that there is only a flicker of recollection and some uncertainty at first. But yes, we used to know each other, didn“t we? Right? Alas, there is a chance for a brief catching-up, but small talk at best. Then we go our separate ways, both parties wondering how such a once strong connection could have gotten lost. But with one last glance over our shoulder, as the person vanishes into the distance and we move on with our day and our life, we know. You were my dream girl, once. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you. But life happened. And a lot of growing up. And as you walk to the gate to retrieve your luggage and a moment of worry befalls you because your suitcase is not among the first pieces to come from the mouth of the machine via the slow-moving conveyor belt, the other person“s face, once so close and intimate to your own in moments of hopeful, youthful passion, now unfamiliar, could have been that of any random stranger, and she means as little to you, and you to her. This was our fate, and the fate of those we once called friends and lovers, who now live on a plane of existence different from our own. Such, we realize and then forget, is the way of the world. But when Superman“s alter-ego Clark Kent had a chance encounter with the person who had been his dream girl when he was an adolescent and he went by the name Superboy, this situation was different. While he remembered the young girl, who was a woman now, he was a complete stranger to her. She was a flight attendant on a plane Clark happened to be on during a business trip, and this was where their chance encounter took place, after so many years had passed. He wasn“t surprised in the least nor unduly disturbed that she did not recall any of their shared memories. And those they had had. This was not an unrequited love fantasy, a high school crush with the other person not knowing you even existed. And this was no affair of purely torrid passion either. Their romance was a true love story, in spirit as well as in body. But like with many other strange occurrences in his life as The Last Son of Krypton, this also was no ordinary love story. It couldn“t have been with him. And even though Clark was finally in a relationship with his co-worker Lois Lane at this time, something he had dreamt about had come true, Lois was in love with him as his human alter-ego and not with the supergod he was sans his glasses, still prompted by the adult version of the girl in his proximity, his eyes and his mind wandered back to the magical place of his teenage years and to the time when he was growing up in a small town in Kansas as the adopted son of a farmer turned owner of a general store, and his kind wife Martha. And like his recollections now felt like a dream, his romance with Misty had started like a reverie, and with a whispered request. Lana Lang, his neighbor and the girl who was in love with Superboy, but who showed zero romantic interest in him as Clark, his secret well-shielded from her despite her many suspicions, was to serve as a go-between. The note he“d given her, the one in which all his deep feelings were expressed in mere words, was not intended for the girl with whom he had grown up, but for Misty, the most popular girl at his school. And she now cut in when he and Lana were dancing at their high school party. And while his male classmates nearly lost their wits, such as those were, it was she who now danced with Clark, and even much closer than Lana had ever wanted to. And while he left the school dance together with her, all those years of hiding his confident and masculine superhero identity whenever he put on his horn-rimmed specs and he sheathed himself in the most uncool look like a wolf in sheep“s clothing, had made him insecure and self-conscious. He simply had to ask her: “You sure you don“t mind leaving the dance with me, Misty? A lot of guys offered to take you home!”“ To which Misty, who had just moved with her parents to Smallville two weeks ago, replied: “I think I made the right choice! What do you think?”“ And with these words barely spoken, she kissed him on the mouth, eagerly holding his head in the right position. The two teenagers closed their eyes and let it happen. Then, after she had invited him to her house that still felt very new, he inquired about her parents, of course. But Misty casually informed him: “They are both out of town today.”“ She took him by the hand and to a screen for a slide projector. She had magnified his letter to her, and she positioned herself between the screen and the projector with his words “girl of my dreams”“ written all across her slender frame as if tattooed on her face, her arms and her dress. She looked straight at him when she explained: “You see, my favorite hobby is handwriting analysis and after studying this sample very closely, it reveals the person who wrote it displays great self-confidence, a healthy aggressive ego, and incredible raw courage! All of those are traits you aren“t supposed to have, Clark Kent!”“ And to not give him the opportunity to come with an excuse to untangle this obvious disparity, she asked Clark to stand right in front of the screen while she changed the slides in the projector. Misty“s soft voice indeed moved The Boy of Steel with a slight command. While Misty now projected this new slide onto him, he stood right there like Lana had once stood in front of firing squad made up of mind-controlled members of The Legion of Super-Heroes when he had taken Lana to a future that was so different from the world he lived in. But like what he witnessed with his attractive teammates; he now also saw in Misty. The girl knew what she wanted, and she was not going to be denied. While Misty now had an image of his other self trained on his body, a picture of Superboy, he stood revealed and his legs nearly gave in like Lana“s had when she believed herself shot right through the heart by a ray gun that had not been invented in her own time. Misty was a super-genius and she had figured out his secret identity. Luckily for him, she was not the kind of highly intelligent student who got portrayed as a super-nerd. She was brilliant and she was beautiful. And when she removed his glasses, he could only commend that she was “a wonder”“. Thankfully, Martha Kent didn“t possess Misty“s incredible perception, when she concluded: “Clark“s bed is still made! I wish he wouldn“t go out on these all-night patrols!”“ But while in the story it was the 50s, this was a tale from 1977, retroactively inserted into his personal history when it got published in issue No. 12 of DC Super Stars as conceived by writer Cary Bates and artists Curt Swan and Murphy Anderson.
Readers in the 1970s, with their own hormones hungrily kicking in, knew exactly what was going on all around them, when the stench from people clad in polyester apparel came in a new fragrance than just sweat. And they knew what had just happened in this comic, as they knew that Misty“s pink lipstick lips were a promise. And while he spent his time with Misty now, Clark could not neglect his duties as hero entirely. Especially not when three ape-like, hairy giants tore up Smallville. After he had captured them, clearly all the while no longer looking like a boy, but like a man, the man he was destined to become, a shrewd circus operator wanted Superboy to hand these poor beasts over to him. Claiming that his men had trapped the giants in the surrounding woods, he wanted them displayed as the latest attraction of his side show. This didn“t sit right with the hero, of course. Slyly, without tripping his hand, lest his image or his motives were called into question, Superboy let his quarry escape. Sent after them by the angry circus manager, he saw to it, that the creatures found their freedom away from human beings. And at this moment his teacher made an appearance once again. Superboy remembered him well. Their paths had crossed before, in publication history, twenty years earlier in Action Comics No. 240. When meeting the teacher, who was a robot like all teachers on Krypton, Superboy had learned that his father Jor-El had built this model for a specific reason. Back when the brilliant scientist still believed that he could migrate his whole family safely to Earth, he had already deducted that our yellow sun would grant them vast powers. As adults, he figured he and his wife Lara would know how to use these gifts responsibly, but his infant son was a different matter entirely. Hence, he constructed a teacher to show baby Kal-El how to act in the right way. Oddly, when the doomed planet exploded sooner than anticipated, but not before Jor-El sent away his only child, of course, the robot teacher also survived. However, his controls were shut down until a passing star re-activated him years later. When he followed his program and he travelled to Earth, he discovered that Krypton“s last son was a pre-teen by then. Still, his circuitry found him lacking a proper education. After schooling the boy, the robot told him that the results were such, that he could not be Superboy any longer since he was a danger to others. After some sulking from the twelve-year-old, as was to be expected, and a subsequent reminder from his man-made tutor that this was the expressed request from his late father, the kid relented quickly. As luck would have it, credulity was not part of his curriculum, since to his relieve he momentarily found out that this was but a final exercise, as the robot explained without fail in his mechanical voice: “That was the final test, Superboy”¦ to see if you“d sacrifice your own wishes for the good of others! And you“ve passed, with honors as you passed all the tests!”“ Then, with the words “I have nothing more to teach you”“, the robot teacher flew off under the power of his rocket jets, leaving a very relieved Superboy behind, who thought by himself “There goes the last link with my father and Krypton”¦”“, but he would turn out to have been wrong. On both accounts. For one, right before Lana gave Misty his letter, his teacher had returned. And contrary to his earlier statement, his robot brain had since concluded that the boy needed additional schooling. After a puzzled Superboy had inquired why he thought this was necessary, he got his explanation: “But now you“re on the edge of manhood! The time has come for us to find out if you“re ready for the added challenges and responsibilities that will go with being a Superman!”“ And when he thus encountered his teacher after he had let the three hairy gorilla-like beasts go so they could roam free as nature intended; this found his approval. But as so very often, what in a comic book story began with a brief caption “But the next moment”¦”“, those words ominously floating in the air in the next panel, would end in tragedy. There was Misty. She was running towards him as one of these three beasts turned towards her and in kind repaid his compassion to their plight by throwing a rock at the girl“s head. The blow killed Misty on the spot. Cradling her in his muscular arms, Superboy found that he did not possess the superpower to bring her back to life. Seconds later his attention turned to the culprit, and standing over the beast, he now was ready to administer a fatal blow to the brute“s skull in response. Even with his heart bleeding from a wound unlike any other he had ever felt before, he found that he couldn“t kill the ape-like being: “I can“t take a life”¦ not even for this”¦”“ And by doing so, he once again passed a test, once again called the “final test”“ by his robot teacher who had orchestrated the whole affair as Superboy was to find out. The machine man explained: “I had to see if you could control your awesome powers even in a moment of extreme rage and grief.”“ And just at this moment, Misty raised up from the ground. The girl was alive. Her death had been a ruse. But not only this. When Superboy saw that his dream girl failed to recognize him, his robot told him the whole truth: “There never was a Misty. I selected this girl among thousands after I computed the requirements of your ideal physical type!”“ It only got worse from there, while his teacher continued to tell Superboy what he had done, he could only choke with sadness, and a confused girl was looking around as if she had woken from a dream to a reality she did not know: “I programmed her mind with all the traits you hoped for in a girl. It was impossible for you to avoid falling in love with her. I will return her to her own town so she can resume her own life. Needless to say, she“ll remember nothing of you”¦!”“ A rightfully angry Superboy reacted in a way that further called the teachings of the metal man in question. While he was concerned with how he had been deceived again and manipulated in such a cruel manner, he now even rejected the label “boy”“, because “after what I“ve been through”¦ I deserve to be called a man!”“, he clearly cared little about what this robot man had done to the girl. It was she who was once again a bit puzzled when as an adult, she found this stranger starring at her. She asked him point blank what was up with that, and his answer was very telling: “Miss, would you believe me if I said you were the girl of my dreams?”“ Thus, ended the story that saw Superboy become a man.
And Superboy was wrong about his robot teacher being his last link with Krypton. As Superman, he had discovered a whole city from his doomed home planet aboard the spaceship of the evil being Brainiac, first a creature of flesh and blood, and later retconned as a cybernetic entity not unlike his teacher, but still with a humanoid face and body, yet not to disperse knowledge and to serve as a guide, but as a spy for the machines who in turn had created him. Brainiac was in the habit of shrinking entire cities to the size of an ant farm and to then store them in bottles. And among his trophies there was also a city from the planet of Krypton, Kandor, its former capital. Unwittingly, the green-skinned villain spared this city and his now insect-sized citizens from the fate that was to befall the planet of Superman“s birth. Unable to reverse the process, Superman took possession of Brainiac“s prize and stored the bottle and the city deep within his Fortress of Solitude. But he was destined to remain the loneliest man on the planet for a scant few months. Just ten issues after he“d discovered a fully inhabited city from Krypton, albeit in a state that this did little to affect his sense of uniqueness or his solitary life, Superman learned that there was another member of his family alive. When she reached Earth in a rocket in Action Comics No. 252 (1959), she was not a baby, but a pretty teenage girl who already wore a uniform like his, but for girls. And as such he treated her. Like his robot teacher who had been programmed to be just that, Superman saw himself as a mentor and as qualified counselor to his cousin Kara. And Superman acted in a way an older man would after finding out he had a young dependent. He placed her in an orphanage lest he be unduly disturbed in his daily routine. And for good reason it seemed. When the blonde girl born as Kara Zor-El came up with a new name for herself, one she would wear as a new identity which also included a wig of long brown hair, and she chose the name Linda Lee, this gave him an awkward, uncomfortable pause, as he reflected the associations her choice, unbeknownst to his cousin, had triggered in his mind: “Lana Lang was my girl friend when I was Superboy. Lois Lane replaced her when I became Superman! By sheer coincidence, she picked the same initials”¦”“ And with this he left her in the hands of people he thought would take good care of her, and off he was. Unlike Superman and his younger self, Supergirl would spend the 1960s fairly unchanged. While the world was changing around her, she had her friends to content with, her super-cat and her super-horse. She remained the cute teen writer Otto Binder had created her as, and in whose adventures, Binder maybe found some solace after his daughter Mary had been killed in a car accident when she was only fourteen years old. But then came the 1970s, and Kara was facing her own bout with restlessness and insecurities. This manifested itself most obviously in the many different costumes she was seen in during those years. Her blue uniform got decidedly shorter, and in keeping with the times, thigh-high boots replaced her knee-high ones, and soon the dress itself was ousted in favor of a jumpsuit at first, and then a blue top and short-shorts, until she settled on what would become her standard uniform for many years to come, a long-sleeved, V-neck top, hot pants and knee-high boots. And since she had been allowed to age from a young teen into a woman in her early twenties over the course of the existential quest for who she wanted to be, she also sported a hairstyle that was on vogue in the mid-1970s. By all intends and purposes, she was now the Supergirl of the disco era. And whereas the question of her look seemed to have been settled once and for all, until the 1980s rolled in that is, she longed for a normal life and a companion more than ever. And she told her cousin that much in Superman No. 282 (1974) in “The Loneliest Man in the Universe”“, a story by Martin Pesko with art by Ernie Chan: “This life of a super-heroine takes up too much of my time”¦ sets me apart from everybody else! I want an ordinary life with a husband and children some day, free to do what I choose!”“ In his best effort to imitate his former mentor, with a similar dick move his robotic teacher was wont to display, Superman thought it best to tell her the story of a Kryptonian called Nam-Ek. Upon discovering the remedial effects that could be gained from the glowing horn of a native beast called Rondor by just being close to one of those hideous creatures, he stopped short of nothing, really. With abandon Nam-Ek slayed two of the purple hued animals knowing full well that Rondors were on the list of endangered species on Krypton. Promptly the anti-crime force hounded him after he had so callously harvested the horns from the bodies of the creatures that lay dead at his feet. No longer content with using the horns for the restitutive properties that still lingered within them despite their wearers“ demise, Name-Ek had set his eyes towards the ultimate prize: a new life that would never ever end. Having concocted a serum designed to make himself an immortal, he certainly would not let the police stop him now. His hastened departure precluded him from doing any clinical trials. However, this presented a risk he was willing to take. But once Nam-Ek had swallowed this mixture, to his horror, he was turned into a human Rondor. Granted, he was rendered immortal, but what price of victory. Forthwith, his destiny was to live forever as a pariah. His skin was that of the beasts he had so wantonly slain and he sported a horn like they had as his mark of Cain. Wherever he went on Krypton“s globe, citizens ran from him or chased him off with stones and ray guns. And then, in another cruel twist of fate, Nam-Ek truly found himself alone in a way he had not dreamt possible during his isolation from society. Krypton exploded all around him and thus the endless void of the cosmos was his new home. And due to his own making, there was no reprieve from a life worse than death. As readers saw Nam-Ek drift off into nameless space, emotionally broken from loneliness, Superman closed his tale to Supergirl: “And that“s when he began to cry”¦ and they say that somewhere in space he is crying still”¦”“ And then, with a smug expression on his chiseled face, Kal-El let her have the gist of his tales: “So you see, Kara, sometimes, when we get the things we want most, they turn out to be a curse rather than a blessing.”“ Some great teachings. Supergirl stormed off angrily.
Little did he know that his words and Nam-Ek would come back to haunt him. Only a few months after he had dispersed his wisdom to his cousin with no regard to how she really felt or what her needs were at that particular time, he found himself in a romantic relationship. While Lois and he had dated off and on when he was his super-self, she had finally professed her love for his human alter-ego, and without reservations it seemed. Clearly, this was not one of her plots to get him to reveal to her that under the blue business suit of his identity as local news anchor lay the heart of a superman. Clark and Lois were an item now and they would neither hide their romance from their colleagues nor could they have been stopped from kissing each other in front of Jon Ross, Pete“s pre-pubescent son whom he had befriended and who like his best friend from his own childhood knew his secret identity. Meanwhile, in Superman“s other series, Action Comics, little mentioned was made of their affair. Apart from a sly in-joke by Gerry Conway, Lois Lane was seen kissing Superman, and not just on the cheek. Then again, while Curt Swan was pulling double duty on both books until Kurt Schaffenberger took over, his inker Tex Blaisdell made the art even more look like some earlier exploits that felt totally unconnected to what was going on in the Superman title. And in this series, not only did Frank Springer“s inks much better capture the sense of the zeitgeist, Gerry Conway pulled out all the stops to mess with Superman like his teacher had when he was but a boy on the verge of manhood. The question Conway asked was simple and straightforward enough, but deceivably so: what if Superman was not an alien, but a man of Earth? What effect would this have on him and his relationship with a woman of whom he had always thought that she was from a planet different than his, the planet he still and forever mourned? A simple question that was asked on an explosive cover that must have shocked readers when they spotted it at their local supermarket. The message on the incredible Neal Adams cover for Superman No. 307 (1977) couldn“t have been any clearer. But in case one needed additional confirmation, which indeed seemed redundant, Superman, kept at the size of a helpless toddler due to the effects of a forced perspective, stated the obvious. His cousin Supergirl was of course the main draw that pulled in readers eyes at first. But as if to shield her, like the identities of perpetrators were often blurred out on a live television broadcast, her upper body was out of frame. Only Supergirl“s lower body, her shapely legs and her booted feet were visible, taking up most of the space. Her lower torso was seductively as well as suggestively bent forward. Her slender arms were stretched out, both of her hands were extended, her fingers with their pointy, pink-colored nails were straight, guiding the eyes of the readers away from her long legs, with the comic code“s seal of approval as if tattooed on one of her naked upper thighs. Once your eyes had reached the end of her fingertips and your glance rested at the destination her nails indicated towards, you had to agree with The Man of Steel. Supergirl had clearly gone mad. She had just smashed the bottle that housed the city of Kandor and the city itself to bits and pieces, that now lay at her feet, killing seven million Kryptonians in the process. There simply had to be a fake out, with the story itself offering a reasonable explanation why it never happened like it was shown on the cover. But once you opened the book, there was a very ominous sounding title to this story by Conway and artist Jose Luis Garcia-Lopez: “Krypton”¦ No More!”“ Then again, even casual readers knew, Krypton “was no more”“. Superman“s home planet had exploded. Its core, which was extremely rich in Uranium, had become increasingly unstable, until the planet blew up from the inside out. Luckily, as a baby, Superman had escaped the natural disaster by the skin of his teeth in a small rocket his scientist father had created. But the tragic fate of this idealized world which he had been able to visit through time-travel, still affected Superman. And when an employee came to him with the information that his employers expressed but a cynical disregard for the environment and any safety standards, effectively killing its own staff with vinyl chloride, Superman did not take to such news too kindly. Unlike earlier in his career, he was still willing to temper his anger by choosing to listen to the management of Metro Chemical first. Upon learning that they considered a few sick workers but an acceptable risk, The Man of Tomorrow had heard enough. He now himself was getting sick from all sorts of people who were exploiting his new home to maximize their profits. Soon he was seen as wildly destroying private property. It seemed as if The Champion of the Oppressed had made a comeback. But he also acted selfishly. He was in fear of losing another home, one on which he was a refugee, a planet that couldn“t hope to alleviate his sense of loneliness, since he was not of the Earth, but the orphan son of Krypton. But still, this planet was important to him. And he couldn“t go through the trauma of losing his new home as well. And after some contemplation, Superman raised his fist into the air and solemnly vowed loudly: “Hear me, world! I won“t let you commit planetary suicide! I swear I won“t let you die”¦!”“ Less than a minute later, forty-five seconds to be precise, Superman was seen lifting a gigantic oil tanker out of an ocean with the intent to put it right into orbit, lest there was the chance for a spill to threaten marine life. Thankfully, he had cleared the crew beforehand. Before readers could realize that his feat of holding up the tanker midair with both hands, wasn“t possible without causing structural damage to the vessel, he was once more pestered by the villain of the month, who was as forgettable in design as he was in name. After having done the required battle, there now arrived his cousin Supergirl, and with that male readers were delighted to see that artist Garcia-Lopez made sure that V-neckline of her top plunged even lower than it had before, while the indestructible blue garment had apparently shrunken in process of getting washed, hence now the outline of her navel was clearly visible. Undeterred by such a minor wardrobe malfunction, she put an end to his noble, but not well thought out crusade. Irritated, he asked her if she“d rather wanted to see “Earth to end like Krypton”¦ in ruins?”“ But she found it more than appropriate that now it was her turn to enlighten him with some teachings of her own. Thus, Kara let him have the cold and harsh truth, a reality, she told him, he had been unable to face: “There is no planet Krypton!… there never was!”“ And as the Man of Steel fell silent, many thoughts raced through his head. When the day had started, a cute girl named Terri had made a pass at him. Seemingly, he was a fly guy now as Clark Kent as well. In the presence of Lois Lane, his girlfriend, she hooked up with him, reminding him, that he had promised her dinner. And while Lois was there, promising him his standard beef bourguignon (a dish that had been mentioned so often, that now even little kids began to wonder if they were really talking about food), he instead went with Terri who began to talk with him as if either he or she was a child, making the fact that she was barely of age so much more obvious. And while the pretty redhead saw him as a “groovy guy”“ and as “one hunk of a man”“, Clark now had second thoughts: “You call me a man”¦ but I“m really a native of a planet called Krypton”¦ and much as I like you, we can never be anything to each other any more than Lois and I! I“m an alien, an outcast”¦ a loner”¦”“ But what if he wasn“t? What if Krypton had never been real after all? What if he was no superman, but a man?
After making such a bold claim, casting doubt on his heritage, and by implication her own, Kara led him to his fortress, that in its stark coldness in a way represented the walls he had built around his heart. It took her only seconds to operate the gigantic golden key. Hardly had they set foot inside this sanctuary, Supergirl began attacking the statues he had erected to honor his parents who had secured his survival. But he could challenge Kara. Did he not have proof that Krypton was not a figment of his imagination? He pointed to the bottle that contained the city stolen from his home planet by the evil robot Brainiac. But Supergirl asked him to look closely, and Superman did: “Those buildings are plastic models, the sort of thing any child can buy in a toy store! And as for the people”¦”“ Yes, those were dolls. And while Kara now violently hit his chest, lashing out at the symbol he wore with pride as if this was a case of domestic abuse, she laid it all out, showing no signs of mercy or compassion like he had been blind to her plight when Kara had opened up to him about wanting a different life for herself: “Face it Clark”¦ you“ve been ill! You created the whole Krypton fantasy to escape the reality of your life, a reality you could not face!”“ And with these words spoken, she simply smashed the bottle with its model citizens on the floor, and it became readily apparent that she did not harm one single soul in the process, other than perhaps his. But she was not done yet. Next she showed him old footage of their fathers, “scientists working in an atomic lab!”“ But these were not their fathers from Krypton, but the men of Earth who had taken care of them, Jonathan Kent and Fred Danvers. No, there was no business about the yellow sun. They both were mutants. They were human beings. This severely uprooted emotionally, Superman knew just one thing for certain anymore: “The nightmare isn“t over! It“s just the beginning”¦”“ And the story continued right into the next issue, the art now sharpened by inker Frank Springer as if to add more focus to what was going to unfold. While Superman flew off to be alone and to think, readers saw that Kara was now sneakily communicating with an unknown party. Back in Metropolis, and now in his Clark Kent identity, he found out that having a girlfriend came with its own set of challenges. When Clark opened the door to his apartment, there was Lois, carrying a tray of his favorite meal”¦ beef bourguignon. She had found it easy to charm his superintendent to gain access to his bachelor pad. And Lois even admitted that he had made her jealous when she had witnessed how receptive he was to the allure of a girl half his age. It was not revealed when Lois left, but when Clark got up the next morning and he inspected the secret room in his apartment, he found that all the mementos from the lost world of Krypton were but trinkets. Even the Phantom-Zone projector was a simple lamp. There could only be one explanation: “Supergirl must be telling the truth!”“ But then it was time for a job for Superman. The villain he had fought in the previous issue was not alone after all. He had a mentor who was as powerful as he was crazy. But what an insult it would have been, had the bad guy been made aware that Superman outsmarted him easily, even while his thoughts were otherwise occupied: “I“ve lived a life which now seems to be a lie. Perhaps it“s time I changed my life, and give it new meaning”¦ but change it to what?”“ But little did he suspect, that while he pondered a possible course correction for his life, there were those who knew about what he was going through, even as they were observing a fleet of space-going warships who came for a tiny planet that lay mid-way of the island called Earth. And they understood well, that a Superman who was of Earth would no longer care much for what occurred in outer space. His loyalties were now undivided. The blue planet was no longer his adopted home. It had been his birthplace all along. The cover for the next issue immediately clued readers in, that even though his life was now as broken as the bottle that had housed a tiny, make believe city, the world“s most popular super-hero would not refrain from doing battle in outer space, albeit to his and Supergirl“s detriment as depicted by Garcia-Lopez and cover inker Bob Oksner. Even though this time Superman was front and center while his blonde cousin seemed like a little broken doll, as they were floating above the planet Xonn, The Man of Metropolis was in pain as well. Not only had the orange sun around which the alien world circled, severely reduced his awesome powers, he was blind as well. And as if to hasten his doom, an armored alien warrior stood above him, a futuristic samurai, but not with two arms and one katana at his disposal, but with four arms and three blades, each of which seemed well sufficient to dispatch The Man of Steel in his weakened state. What had caused such a tableau of desperation? Readers simply had to find out. The story started well, with a tremendously confident, impossibly ripped Superman taking out a whole army of heavily armed low-lives. If a reader had missed the previous two issues, he could have easily been forgiven for not noticing the traumatic state Superman was in. His muscular body seemed indicative of this. With the percentage of his body fat going for less than zero, he had likewise shed much of his identity in the process. Robbed of his made-up heritage, he was a new man. While the chief of police was grateful for his intervention, he was still puzzled that the hero would take the time to deal with a bunch of common crooks. To which Superman answered: “After all”¦ this is my planet, isn“t it? It“s my home”¦ and a man has to protect his home first”¦ last and always!”“ But even readers who did not know what change had befallen their hero, they had to notice that something was not right when just a few panels later, here he was in his alter-ego as news anchor Clark Kent, but not in his trademark blue suit, but in the uniform of a football player. And right on cue, there was his girlfriend Lois Lane to spur him on. While this was but a match between the staff of broadcast companies and as such nothing out of the ordinary, to him it was a big deal. Had he not barred himself from activities like these during his boyhood days and also as an adult for fear he might give away his secret or hurt someone in the heat of a sporting contest? And by doing so, he knew full well that he deprived himself of the opportunity to have an active social life even as Clark Kent. This seemed to lie far behind him. And there he was as Clark Kent, ready to wreak havoc on the football field while Lois and Terri smiled at him. By implication, both women were his, if he wanted them. Lois came to his apartment anyway to take care of his needs, and Terri, with the word Mascot on her shirt, would do just the same if he said the word. Both of these beautiful women desired him as Clark Kent. This was the life he had always dreamt of: “This is what my life“s been missing”¦ what I used to deny myself when I believed myself a ”˜Kryptonian“, human contact! Because I thought I was an alien, I avoided real human relationships. But what I learned a few days ago from Supergirl has changed everything.”“ He got a life!
As with any form of media in the late 70s that was geared towards housewives and adolescents, there simply had to be a steamy shower scene. Still it must have felt odd to readers that something this kinky would even find its way into a comic book, since these were guarded by the Comics Code Authority. But it was the 70s, and this scene did not only involve a semi-naked Superman. When after the game, Clark stepped from the shower in the locker room, like in some pubescent fantasy there was Supergirl waiting for him, her upper body in the shadow, her naked legs crossed at the knees, one booted foot dangling in the air. This felt tantalizing and wrong in more ways than one, the least of which, because these were cousins. She had even brought the foresight to lock the door on her way in, as she brought a request to him. An alien invasion force was targeting the planet Xonn. She needed his help in defending the planet. But her way of prying him loose from his romantic fantasies of space and its many worlds had so much as cured him from any desire to assist an alien race for the foreseeable future. Rejected thusly, she once again slapped him hard across the room. She really had some anger issues when it came to her relative. Obviously not as undeterred as he had seemed, he paced around his apartment like a caged beast while his girlfriend Lois was getting dinner ready. Clearly, as he was looking out of his window, simultaneously lost in thought, Garcia-Lopez and Springer gave readers Sexy-Beast Clark Kent in perfection. And while he now used his super-telescopic vision to scan the heavens, Lois noticed. She noticed that he was not present in the room with her. And he now saw that Supergirl was fighting an alien armada, and perhaps since he had behaved like a dog to her, she had enlisted his dog to assist her. But still it was not enough. Learning a thing or two from women, Clark pretended that he had “a splitting headache”“. Confident in his validated masculinity and his relationship he simply couldn“t leave it at that. As he was pushing Lois out of his apartment, he made his excuse as obvious as it could have been. While she now stood outside in the hallway, realizing that yes, this had just happened, and she angrily kicked the door, he was already lightyears into space. But all his bravery, machismo and brawn could not hope to win the day when he found himself under an orange sun and up against fierce, armored fighters who used swords and laser guns without prejudice. Soon Superman ended up as a prisoner of war, sharing the same cell with Kara and his dog Krypto. And it was in this windowless room, after he had gone blind under this strange sun, that she opened his eyes once again. Not in regard to this business about Krypton. He had figured that out himself. She had lied to him. But the why came as surprise. She and the Kandorians had been afraid that he was going off the deep end in his attempt to protect Earth from its people, simply because they thought as an orphan, his actions betrayed signs of severe abandonment. Since their psychologists were in favor of removing a problem than rather solve it, they had recommended a rather unique treatment, as was to be expected from a people who carried a lot of trauma themselves from being shrunken and getting forcefully uprooted from their home, to live out their days in a bottle under an artificial red sun. But then of course, he won the day and defeated the aliens, and even squeezed in a lesson for Supergirl. She of all people should have known. When Kara had arrived on Earth, he had shunted her out of sight and out of his life. Not only had he placed her in an orphanage, but he took his sweet time until he told her it was alright for her to reveal herself to the world. While she was introduced to the world properly right on the cover for Action Comics No. 285 (1962), that he had waited nearly three year to make this happen, made the whole situation feel as if he was a man who was finally ready own up to a dirty family secret. As if to properly prepare her for what would lie in store for her, while Supergirl was on the cover of Action Comics No. 252, her debut issue, her story came third, after the introduction of the new villain Metallo, and a gorilla story. And speaking of the vile villain“s origin story. The story was written at a time during which Lois was still obsessed with finding out Superman“s civilian identity. When she witnessed a colleague surviving a hail of bullets fired straight at him with not so much of a scratch, Ms. Lane came to the only conclusion that seemed logical under these circumstances. A criminal, John Corben did not mind being mistaken for Superman by Lois, who seemed unfazed that the bullets were original intended for her. They immediately went for dinner in a Chinese restaurant, with Corben learning from a fortune cookie: “Neither faint heart nor false heart e“er won a fair maid!”“ However, Corben“s mechanical heart was powered by either Uranium or Kryptonite, and both were directly tied to Superman“s home world.
It was either another irony of his life, or perhaps it was designed this way by the man who would shape the course of his life in such a profound way hardly any other writer had been allowed to since the days when Mort Weisinger reigned supreme as editor, but when a second Metallo had his debut, once again Superman“s incessant need to keep secrets from those around him, and especially from Lois, came back to haunt him. Like his deceased predecessor had, the new Metallo also possessed a heart that was but a stone from Superman“s home world, and which was radioactive to The Man of Steel. And while it was true that right underneath Superman“s uniform and Clark“s business suits lay the heart of a superman, who was a man after all, this heart was now equally toxic from all the stored-up secrets and the constant lies. When he“d had his chance encounter with the woman who as a teenager had been manipulated in such a way that she became but a vessel for his own adolescent fantasies, even as an adult, he displayed no concern or regard for the crimes his teacher had committed towards the girl, or for his participation in this affair, albeit unwillingly, least of all for Mindy herself. Told from his perspective, the tale revealed much about his character and the little care he had for others on an interpersonal level. Relationships need to be based on honesty and trust. And respect for each other. And with the way Clark had pushed Lois out of his apartment in Superman No. 309, Lois had to be reminded of how Superman often treated her. But this was Clark now. The message was self-evident: Superman did not respect her, and neither did Clark Kent. And this was when a new writer entered the scene who would lead the Superman series to new heights during the course of the next two years and who brought the action as well as the inter-personal drama, and who was not afraid to disregard or re-shape the precious continuity of the series and the world of these characters as he saw fit. In that regard and especially with the way he“d entered into the field of writing for comics, Martin Pesko was a trickster not unlike some of the villains Superman would encounter on occasion. Pesko did not land on the radar of editor Julius Schwartz at DC because of the two short pieces he had been able to sell to Warren Publishing“s horror magazine line, but simply since he was a near constant contributor to the letters pages of DC books, often with critical comments. Earning the nickname “Pesky Pesko”“, his letter writing campaign was designed to get him the attention of the higher-ups at DC Comics, an approach his friend and benefactor, comic writer Mike Friedrich had suggested. And alas, after the many letters he had sent since 1968, he was hired by Schwartz when he was just nineteen years old. Thus, in 1973, Martin Pesko began his career as comic writer in earnest, as he would be tasked with writing backup stories like the one in Superman No. 282. Four years later, he was made the regular Superman writer with issue No. 310. And not only did he bring back Metallo, who had died in his introductory tale and whose mantle was now taken up by his brother Roger who blamed Superman for his sibling“s demise, but despite his young age, he understood that where Gerry Conway had left off Lois and Clark, that their relationship had run its course. And Pesko was not going to waste any time. The issue starts with Superman taking out some goons who belong to the secret organization known as Skull (think DC“s version of Hydra) who are pulling off a heist at S.T.A.R. Labs, like Skull another holdover from previous runs that would feature large in Pesko“s run. Unfortunately, one of the crooks gets buried under some rubble during the fight, and Superman has a run-in with Executive Director of the research facility. Also, like established by previous writers, Dr. Albert Michaels is a major tool. Soon however, Superman“s attention returns to his date with Lois to which he is running late already. But it is not his girlfriend who he finds at the Galaxy Broadcasting Building, on whose network WGBS-TV Clark had been working as a local news anchor since the early 70s, but his workplace nemesis Steve Lombard. Clark was the last to know it seems, as Lombard told him he was in the midst of collecting some money around to office to buy a going away gift for Lois. A stunned Clark finally gets a chance to talk to Lois in private after their dinner date. And this is when, like she once did with Superman after the death of her sister Lucy, she expresses her heart to her beau who is not a superman, but a regular joe: “I can“t handle this relationship any more. You“re so confusing. It“s driving me crazy!”“ Clark needs to interrupt her, of course, but Lois goes on to explain: “One minute you“re a bumbling clod”¦ with all the grace of hippo in orthopedic shoes! And the next, you“re Prince Charming and I“m so stunned by your personality-change I get mushy over you!”“ Then, she drops the bombshell: “And what“s the point, anyway? We both know you“re just the consolation prize to me, because I can“t have the man I really love”¦ Superman. Who are we kidding, Clark? Our relationship isn“t honest and that“s not fair to you or me!”“ As she excuses herself to check on her makeup, since she is now in tears, he thinks it a good idea to lock Lois in his bathroom, because it was once again time for job for Superman. Lombard, who seemingly has his own set of issues and who just wants to prove that he is not an over-the-hill jock, but that he is a fine reporter, got himself into trouble. And this is when readers finally saw the new Metallo. He was indeed the guy from earlier who got crushed. Skull had saved him by building a robotic body for him. Superman was not only going to find out that he was the brother of the man who once almost killed him, but this Metallo had a heart of Green Kryptonite, too, albeit Synthetic Kryptonite, courtesy of Skull. And thus, not only had the new writer done away with the Lois and Clark relationship, but he re-introduced the green mineral that had been absent from the world of Superman since all Kryptonite was turned into iron in Superman No. 233 (1971). But if readers got the impression that this was their fathers“ Superman, they were in for a shock.
After the issue had ended with this incarnation of Metallo dying as well, seemingly, then raising from a stretcher in the morgue, and an angry Lois, finally freed by Clark, storming out of his apartment, Pesko was just getting started. Superman No. 311 (1977) began with a cold open. Nam-Ek, the immortal man whom Pesko had introduced in a backup story in Superman No. 282, had returned, and he was mopping the floor not only with Superman but with The Flash as well. But before there was any resolution to this battle, the story first cut to an unknown observer who viewed a cross-country train on his monitor while he stroked an alien creature like it was a cat and he a villain from a Bond movie. Clark and his colleagues were travelling to Central City for a convention. This was The Scarlet Speedster“s base of operation and this was where Lois wanted to move to, in her attempt to put some distance between herself and Clark, and Superman. With Clark out of Lois“ life, but still very much present on the train, his colleague Steve Lombard, who had survived his abduction by Skull, put the move on Lois to show his nephew Jamie how to talk to the ladies. The kid was along for the ride since his father was busy. Lois herself got an earful when she was talking to The Flash, and Iris West caught wind of that. Secretly the wife of the hero, and a fellow reporter, she had heard of her reputation: “Maybe you have given up on the idea of Supes ever giving you a tumble”¦ so you“re leaving Metro with a bad case of sour grapes! But just remember one thing: Central city doesn“t like home wreckers!”“ Lois couldn“t catch a break it seemed. But then, a group of people began to topple all around them. On their faces they exhibited large specks in the same color to which Nam-Ek“s skin had turned right after he“d used his untested formula on himself, rendering him unchaste and an outcast on his native world of Krypton. A plague had befallen the citizens of Central City, one that came with deadly consequences. And surely, Superman reasoned, with the immortal man now walking the Earth, this was no coincidence. This was where the story aligned with the cold open in which The Flash had been punched into orbit, leaving the Kryptonians to settle the score amongst each other. Superman managed to turn the battle away from the city, not to avoid collateral damage, but in want of a weapon against an enemy equally matched to his own powers, all the while he ignored Nam-Ek“s attempts to reason with him. Too convinced is he that the untouchable“s own healing powers have reversed and are causing this disease, that he even uses a volcano on him. As its scolding contents are splashed all around the purple man with the horn of Kryptonian Rondor on his forehead, suddenly Nam-Ek was gone as if he had disintegrated into thin air. As the stunned hero began to scan the area closely with his super-vision, Superman“s fears were proven true. Embedded in the magma, he discovered tiny traces of Green Kryptonite. While these particles were encased in lead, which explained why he hadn“t been affected, the lava had been saturated with the substance lethal to a Kryptonian, even an immortal man. For Superman, there was only one logical conclusion: “I“ve broken my solemn vow never to kill!”“ At least little comfort was to be had in that The Flash was saved by Green Lantern. But when a severely anguished Superman returned to Central City for his dinner date as Clark, to talk things out with his lost love, he hardly heard how she scolded him for being late once again. He was contemplating that after he had taken a life, to stay true to his vow, he now simply had to end his career as superhero. And with emotions at an all-time high between the ex-lovers, Lois fell down to the ground, stricken by the plague. With Nam-Ek gone, Clark realized he had not killed the source of the disease, but its only possible cure. At the heart of the maze there is a monster. There was a monster. Clark knew this, because he had just slain it. He had spared another monster when he was but a youth. But now, as an adult, and more than a man, a Superman even, he had just killed another creature, and in one fell swoop, he had condemned the woman he loved to her death. Because, this beast, this pariah, had only wanted to help him. But as a man of secrets and lies, his heart was such that he could not trust easily. His heart was faint and false.
Author Profile
Chris Buse (RIP)
A comic book reader since 1972. When he is not reading or writing about the books he loves or is listening to The Twilight Sad, you can find Chris at his consulting company in Germany... drinking damn good coffee. Also a proud member of the ICC (International Comics Collective) Podcast with Al Mega and Dave Elliott.
