Pimping the Long Box #5

Blind Adam The Comic PIMP

4 years ago

Greetings my Comic Crusaders family. I hope you’re safe, well and staying warm. On the North East it’s like Captain Cold, The Weather Wizard, Mr. Freeze and the Golden Glider said let’s make the entire north Eastern United States have the worst winter in years. I am sick and tired of snow and ice.

I still can’t believe it’s almost a year now. A year into the pandemic and lock downs. I am so ready for this to end. Cabin fever sucks. But we must stay positive. I do believe this is about to end and we can start to get back to normal. To conventions, strip clubs. Buying pretzels on the street, paying $10 for some drunk in a cookie monster costume to take a picture with us, etc. By the way, if you go to Time Square, avoid that drunken son of a bitch. Ain’t worth the money.

With that, let’s see what’s happening in comic books, pop culture and my so-called mind… Shall we?

Superman and Lois

I just watched the CW’s Superman and Lois and I must say, this show is big pimping. This might be the best Superman other media project of the last ten years. Taylor Hoechlin as Clark Kent and Superman really works. The being a father and a husband aspect of the show is a nice change of pace and I thought the interaction between Jordan and Jonathan is amazing. I especially loved the barn scene and the reaction from the twins when Clark reveals he is Superman. Priceless.

I am not sure about Morgan Edge being the big bad of the show though… Like, really? Morgan Edge? So the big bad of the show is an evil businessman? Or is he supposed to be a B plot story? Morgan Edge first appeared in Jimmy Olson #133 which was the first Superman comic drawn and plotted by Jack the King Kirby to go up in price. Buying this classic bronze age Superman comic at any grade is worth the money.

Why is Lana Lang only in one episode> She is Lana Lang with the sweet Pung Tang. Lana Lang, with her sweet Pung Tawng. Just asks Lex Luthor, ok? That is my favorite robot chicken bit, but it looks as if her daughter will play a major role in the show. I loved Sam Lanbe. I hope Same Lane is in every episode. I also hope they can bring back the actress from Supergirl who played Lucy Lane. I didn’t realize that Sam Lane first appeared back in the 1950s in Superman’s Girlfriend Lois Lane #13. I always thought he was a post crisis thing appearing for the first time in post crisis DC history in Adventures of Superman #424. By the way, that is a cheap comic to be hunting and investing in at this time. I also hope for a Supergirl appearance and guest appearances once Supergirl season six ends. I hope this doesn’t become Smallville 2.0… it does have a Smallville vibe to it. I think by the end of season one, Jonathan will have his powers. I also think maybe Superman and Lois are leading up to the infant crisis event as that Luthor might be Alexander Luthor from Earth 3? His Earth is destroyed and he wants revenge? According to IMDB, Luthor only appears for two episodes. So I wonder could it be a set up the way the newspapers set up the flash dying in the flash season one?

Anyways, just a great show. Also, for anyone that wants to relive Smallville, it is on Hulu. My question is: Can anyone watch Smallville and not think of Alyson Mack and the evil things she did? It takes me out of the show at times. I also wanted to point out two nifty cheap bronze age Superman comics that are worth investing in. One is Superman’s Girlfriend Lois Lane #109 and the other is Superman #317. These showcase Lana Lang becoming a newscaster and not trying to battle Lois to be Clark’s girlfriend.

In closing, the thing that makes this show great is the family. The Kent/Lane family is at the center. Clark learning to become a father, Lois learning to balance being a wife and a mother. I can see books like Superman volume two #50, the engagement issue, the wedding album and even the infamous death of Superman books going up in price.

Remember, I do believe the comic book source material is based a tad on the rebirth mini series Lois and Clark. It ran for eight issues and in issue #8. John gets his Superboy costume. Superman living with his wife and sons also has a Superman rebirth vibe to it. So go chase copies of Superman Rebirth #1. I do hope we get Damon Wayne Robin in this show and I would love to one day see the super sons in the Arrowverse. This show is awesome so go enjoy.

Pimping Star Wars

Here is some comic book math. Star Wars plus cool covers and stories, or funny stories with Star Wars, equals money #testify. So here are a few comics to put on your want lists.

The first is Family Guy Blue Harvest #1. The Family Guy Star Wars parodies are some of the most fun Star Wars spoofs of all time, second only to the Robot Chicken Star Wars specials in the Family Guy Blue Harvest box set. The gift set that is out of print. There were a few collectors items in the set including a Stewie as Darth Vader T Shirt, a pack of Family Guy Blue Harvest trading cards and a mini comic book adaptation of Family Guy Star Wars Blue Harvest. This is worth looking for and quite rare. If you can just buy the box set, or as it is called, the “Family Guy Blue Harvest Gift Set”, as you could most likely PSA the cards and get the Comic Graded by CGC or get it autographed by the cast at some point. Just a great collectable for Family Guy and Star Wars fans. I also really like Crazy Magazine #67, The Empire Strikes out. Everyone in the 1980s bought Mad Magazine or Cracked Magazine for this type of material. Who the fuck gave two shits about crazy magazine? Crazy had some great spoofs and great art. So go seek them out and enjoy. Plus, make the money. Speaking of Mad and Cracked magazines, go chase Cracked Magazine #173 which makes fun of the Empire Strikes back. Also, Mad Magazine #242 which makes fun of the Return of the Jedi. I think all of the Empire and return of the Jedi Burger King glasses will be worth mad money, as will the Star Wars episode 1 Pepsi cans. Especially the gold Yoda can. Happy hunting.

Casting Maitland Ward as Poison Ivy

Yes, I said it. I would cast the hottest Woman in adult XXX movies today. Maitland Ward to play the Gotham city siren Poison Ivy in the upcoming The Batman XXX. The Batman XXX is being produced and directed by the kind of comic book porn movies: Axel Braun. Axel Braun has been making porn movies based on comic books since 2010. The 1966 Adam West TV show was masterfully done. Just look at Axel’s attention to detail. Look at the costumes in one of Axel’s movies, then look at mainstream Hollywood’s. Go ahead, tell me which costumes are better. Go check out the trailer for Superman vs Batman XXX. Go ahead, tell me what trailer and movie has dialogue from the Dark Knight Returns #4. That would be Axel’s. Axel is making a multi episode adult with sex included. Remember, sex is natural. Sex is fun and without sex, none of us would be here. Go enjoy sex. Everyone should but this episode series The Batman XXX will be amazing. It stars Seth Gambel as Bruce Wayne and the mask and cowl look amazing. Seth is no stranger to playing comic book superheroes that fuck. He played Luke Skywalker in Star Wars and Empire Strikes back for vivid entertainment as well as Deadpool. All movies are directed by Axel Braun and Kenzie Taylor is playing Harley Quinn. They even cast The Huntress. I think that the hottest thing in adult entertainment, the greatest crossover star of a generation, Maitland Ward who rose to fame playing Rachel on Boy Meets World, is now the hottest thing in porn and would make the perfect Poison Ivy. I must say, if this gets back to Maitland and Vixen Media Group, I still want to make that movie. I still want to make my dinner with Maitland Ward. I am learning how to cook, taking cooking classes from Hadley School for the Blind. I want to cook Maitland Ward the best chicken parm dinner and interview her for my podcast. Then film a very special event. If you want the full details of what I am talking bout, please listen to episode #571 of Awesomesauce media Radio on Soundcloud. I will include a link.

Just remember, in life, the most difficult step is the first step. Once you take that first step, all the other steps can be taken and become easier and easier. So please, if you have a goal, if you have a dream, no matter how crazy or how impossible it seems, go chase it. Ask yourselves, what is the worst thing that will happen? Life is so short. Why not enjoy your life and take a chance> Go chase your dreams and make them real. If I can just put it out there like this for you, my Comic Crusaders family to see: I want to get pegged by Maitland Ward and have the video of being pegged by Maitland Ward on sites like Many Vids or Pornhub. Then, after that fun ends, I want to get to showcase my new cooking skills by making her a chicken parm dinner. Then, at least I went for it. She could say no, she could say yes. But the first step is asking both Maitland Ward and Vixen Media Group: Can we make my dinner with Maitland a reality? And tell me, wouldn’t Matiland Ward make the perfect Poison Ivy?

TMNT:

TMNT The Last Ronin #2 is a great comic book. TMNT the Last Ronin was Amazing. Brought tears to my eyes. Not spoiling it, go seek it out and read it. I also think it will read better in trade or hardcover.

TMNT Mirage Series #59 is a great speculation play. This is the first appearance of Shadow Jones. Shadow Jones is the step daughter of Casey Jones and April O’neil. With all TMNT back issues going up in price with all the keys and first appearance of Blazing up in price, I want to point this one out. It is a $20 bill but could go higher.

What will spike next?

First it was Pokemon cards, then it was old school Marvel cards, then action figures and the comic book market is on fire. So my question is, what is next? I am betting on fast food toys, happy meal toys from the 1970s-200s. Collector’s cups as well. I am a fan of pogs. Can we make pogs, a simple game, a thing again? How about Go Bots? One of the Low Rent 1980 cartoon franchises… not to get that much love?

Lastly, I want to shout out the YouTube channel. Rinse and Repeat. This channel shows old Saturday morning cartoons including the commercials and all the Fox kids stuff from 1992 – 2001. It’s nice to relive my childhood like that.

Well, that’s it for now. Please stay safe and warm. Wash your hands, use the force and keep your pimp hand strong. Remember, you don’t need sight to have a vision. I love you all, so until next time.

Blind Adam the Comic Pimp Out.