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MOVIE REVIEW: Resident Evil: The Final Chapter

The so-called final installment of the Video Game to Movie franchise sees Alice returning to Raccoon City to find a virus that once airborne should kill anything infected with the T-Virus, including her.  Along the way she meets new faces and old friends and enemies.  Don’t worry if you haven’t seen any of the previous films though as there is a handy catch up bit at the start.

To be honest I don’t like Zombie films or games. I’ve played more than my share and just don’t find the genre that scary or for the most part entertaining.  They all rely on the same beats to get through the stories, and get very similar very quickly.  I did however like a few of the previous films in this series.  They were insane action fun and frolics, and you could use your time with them to escape the pressures and pains of the outside world.  They are like The Fast and The Furious movies, you don’t take them seriously and once you can switch off the world for an hour and a half you come out happy.

I was happy when I heard that they were bringing Alice back for a final adventure in this world and happier when from the production camp they were all singing from the same hymn sheet about this being the final time.  If you could see my expression while writing this review you would see that the happiness is wiped away from me.  They have taken ALL the fun out of the film, all the special moments that made the previous films the smallest bit entertaining.  I can live without mindless action movies being well scripted, but when they are being this poorly made I can hold back no longer. 

This film is just trash from start to finish.  It doesn’t wind down the series, it just opens another door.  I’m going to have to mention the technical things that I normally skip over as students on their first day of film school could control the implements of movie making better than the crew here.  The camera work is so shaky that it made me sea sick, we also get so close to those involved in the action scenes that I can almost tell what Mila had for breakfast the morning of shooting each scene.  Creature design would be fantastic if I could tell you what any of them looked like.  The story is more a greatest hits of the previous films and yet they claim it was written anew for this outing.  I doubt that, I doubt that very much.

As for the performances, there is a terrible feeling from those returning that they’d rather be anywhere else shooting a cereal commercial than doing this.  I hate bashing movies, as you know, but when one is such a painful assault to the senses as this then I’m left with no choice.  I can’t honestly tell you that this is just not my cup of tea and you might have a better experience.  This is just terrible, I’m sure this is the cause of some great pain across the cosmos, I’m battling to give it a one instead of a zero.  They will never know that struggle that is going on inside me over that marking.  The little I seen of the monster designs are the main reason for that, but that’s not worth paying into a cinema to see.  If you are desperate for entertainment and feel like seeing this, just sit in a room on your own and pepper spray your eyes while sticking sharp objects into your hears, it will be cheaper and more fun.  Though obviously don’t do that either.

I hope beyond hope that this is the final time this team get together and make a film like this, I know they will get back together and inflict us with some other cringe worthy piece of trash, one can only hope that their next venture will be more entertaining and they will pick someone who knows how to work a camera to shoot it.  Avoid!

[yasr_overall_rating size=”large”]

Director: Paul W.S. Anderson
W
riter: Paul W.S. Anderson
Stars: Milla Jovovich, Iain Glen, Ali Larter

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Garth Cremona (RIP)
Comic book creator and movie reviewer. You can find out more at www.dublinwriter.com
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